You Don’t Need the Whole Map Before You Start

I have a confession.

I like a plan.

Actually, that’s probably underselling it.

I like a plan, a backup plan, a list for the plan, and preferably some indication that the plan is going to work before I put a whole lot of energy into it.

😂

Which is great.

Until you realize life has absolutely no intention of cooperating with your little spreadsheet.

There have been plenty of times in my life when I thought I needed to know exactly where something was going before I could start.

I needed the whole map.

What happens first?

What happens after that?

How long will this take?

What if it doesn’t work?

What if I choose the wrong thing?

What if I get halfway there and realize I should have gone the other direction?

And you know what happens when you wait until you have answers to every one of those questions?

Sometimes you don’t go anywhere.

I Think We Give Certainty Too Much Credit

There is something very comforting about knowing what comes next.

Unfortunately, most of the things that have mattered in my life did not come with step-by-step instructions.

Careers don’t.

Families definitely don’t.

Starting over doesn’t.

Building something new doesn’t.

And apparently neither does being a grown woman trying to figure out what she wants the next chapter of her life to look like.

Would have been nice.

Very inconsiderate, honestly.

😂

We talk about big decisions as though successful people knew exactly what they were doing from the beginning.

They had a vision.

They made a plan.

They followed the plan.

Everything worked.

The end.

I don’t believe that’s how most people’s lives actually happen.

I think a lot of us take one step because it’s the only step we can see.

Then we get there and realize:

Oh. Okay. Now I can see the next one.

Sometimes You Have to Move Before the Picture Gets Clear

That’s the part I’m learning.

You don’t always get clarity before you start.

Sometimes clarity comes because you started.

You try something.

It works.

Or it doesn’t.

You change it.

You learn something about yourself.

You realize something you thought you wanted isn’t actually what you want anymore.

You discover you’re better at something than you expected.

Or worse.

😂

That’s useful information too.

But you don’t get any of it standing still.

Starting Over Is Weird

Especially when you’re old enough to remember having to print MapQuest directions before leaving the house.

😂

At this point in life, you’d think we’d have everything figured out.

We should know what we’re doing.

We should have the career figured out.

The money figured out.

The house figured out.

The family figured out.

The future figured out.

Meanwhile, half of us are standing in the kitchen trying to remember why we walked in there.

So maybe we can lower the bar a little.

There is no age when life suddenly hands you the completed map.

Sometimes you’re 25 and figuring it out.

Sometimes you’re 35.

Sometimes you’re 49.

Sometimes you’re 60.

Sometimes you’re starting something brand new when everybody—including you—thought you’d be settled by now.

That doesn’t mean you’re behind.

It means you’re still going somewhere.

I Used to Think Changing Direction Meant the Original Plan Failed

I don’t anymore.

Sometimes you make the best decision you can with the information you have.

Then you get new information.

You change.

Your circumstances change.

Your priorities change.

Something you thought was going to fit forever suddenly doesn’t fit at all.

Changing direction isn’t necessarily quitting.

Sometimes it’s paying attention.

That’s a lesson I wish I’d learned earlier.

Because I think we waste a lot of time trying to force ourselves to stay committed to decisions made by an earlier version of us.

She didn’t know what you know now.

Give her a break.

She was doing her best.

She probably also had much thinner eyebrows.

😂

You Don’t Have to Know Where Something Ends to Know Where It Starts

This may be the biggest thing.

You don’t need to know whether the idea will become a business.

Start the idea.

You don’t need to know whether you’ll still be doing it five years from now.

Try it.

You don’t need the entire plan for changing careers.

Figure out the first move.

You don’t need to know exactly how you’re going to accomplish the giant thing.

Do the small thing sitting directly in front of you.

Sometimes we make the first step carry the weight of the entire journey.

That’s a lot to ask from one little step.

Maybe its only job is to get you to step two.

And Yes, You Might Get It Wrong

I know.

Rude.

😂

You may start something and realize you hate it.

You may spend money on something that doesn’t work.

You may create something nobody cares about.

You may take the wrong job.

Trust the wrong person.

Choose the wrong direction.

You may have to turn around.

But making a wrong turn doesn’t mean you ruined the trip.

Sometimes it just means:

Well. We’re not going that way again.

Useful information.

And for my fellow Gen X people, remember—we used to miss an exit and just keep driving until we found somewhere to turn around.

There was no woman in the dashboard calmly saying:

“Recalculating.”

We WERE the recalculation.

😂

Maybe we’re more qualified for this than we think.

I’ve Had More Than One Version of My Life

I think that’s something I’m appreciating more as I get older.

There hasn’t been one Rachel.

There’s been a whole collection of them.

Different jobs.

Different priorities.

Different seasons.

Different versions of what I thought success looked like.

Some things lasted.

Some didn’t.

Some things I thought were detours turned out to teach me exactly what I needed for whatever came next.

And some chapters?

I was perfectly happy to close those suckers.

😂

But none of them came with the whole map.

I figured them out while I was living them.

I’m still figuring this one out.

Maybe That’s the Point

Maybe we’re not supposed to know everything before we begin.

Maybe knowing everything would ruin half of it anyway.

There are things in my life now that I never could have planned.

People I wouldn’t have met.

Skills I didn’t know I’d need.

Things that went wrong and somehow pushed me somewhere better.

Things that scared the absolute hell out of me and later became part of who I am.

None of those were on the map.

A Front Porch Rachel Thought

I’ve spent a lot of my life believing I needed to know where I was going before I started moving.

I’m finally realizing that’s backwards.

Sometimes you only need to know:

What’s the next right thing?

Not the next ten things.

Not where you’ll be five years from now.

Not whether everybody else understands what you’re doing.

Just the next thing.

Make the phone call.

Write the first page.

Apply for the job.

Start the business.

Take the class.

Post the video.

Have the conversation.

Walk through the door.

Then see what becomes visible from there.

Maybe it works.

Maybe it doesn’t.

Maybe six months from now you laugh because you ended up somewhere completely different from where you thought you were headed.

That’s okay.

You can change direction.

You can recalculate.

You can take the scenic route.

Hell, apparently you can even end up on a gravel road behind a tractor we’ve now given a name.

😂

You don’t need the whole map.

You just need enough courage for the next turn.

Real Estate. Real Life. Rachel.